Elsa

I'm lying in bed thinking about my friend Elsa and the memories I have of her.
I can't stop thinking about her. She is an inspiration to so many of us fighting cancer.she was so brave and focused on getting healthy.

I cry for her and wish I could of helped her. I find life to be so unfair.

I love and miss her. I will miss our talks about getting on opera and discussing Sarcoma cancer! We both felt that not enough money went to our rare disease. Are we not good enough to do research on? Elsa and I had a whole plan....and a book waiting to be written.

Elsa if you can hear me in heaven....I will figure this out. One problem....opera is going off the air! But, I can write the book!!

I'll see you again Elsa.

All my love and in my heart forever.
You will never be forgotten.

Fog

I'm trying to snap out of this funk that I am in. I'm floating through the days in a fog. I have so many things going on. My mind can't quiet itself at night and my sleeping is awful. I know the medicine is doing it to me. I haven't been feeling that great. I wake up every morning with a headache. I have a bumpy mess on my shoulders and chest....I'm kind of gross right

Today was wonderful. I spent the day with a friend who is pregnant. Today was her due date and I went to the doctor with her for her check up and sonogram.

It made me want so many things that I can't have. I realized that I need to make those things happen in my life.

Paul and I are moving forward with another exciting chapter.

     
“It's really hard to walk in a single woman's shoes -- that's why you sometimes need really special shoes!”

Good Days

Just letting everyone know that I am feeling good. I wasn't sure how I was going to feel after taking the pills. The drug fact sheet has a ton of interesting side effects.

I am on my second day of the 2mg Sirolimus pill.  My stomach is bothering me, but I believe it's from a mix of anxiety and nerves. It really is a small dose.

I have so many things I could blog about right now. I just feel that I need a few days to get my thoughts together.

I hope everyone is having a great weekend.

Michelle

Sirolimus

I'm up, it's late. I'm in bed watching my dogs sleep peacefully. I am also looking at my new prescription for sirolimus. I feel sick just thinking about it.
The day started out great. I just couldn't move this morning. I threw on some workout clothes and just sat in my kitchen.

I bottled up my anger and sadness all day. I thought I'd feel better after the doctor.

I can't stop crying.

I am exhausted.