Wednesday, June 26, 2013

so sorry for our loss.

As many of you have figured out by now, our beautiful Michelle passed away last Sunday June 23rd at 7:07 AM. it was her favorite type of day, hot, sunny and humid, the first such day of summer which was her favorite season, hence the name "beach girl"

From following her posts you are all aware of the strength, humor, and stubbornness she faced down this disease with, until the very end she was fighting and never wanted to give up, because as she told me last week, i love you to much to quit. so she bravely took on another round of chemo which was 4 days in a row, each day 11 hours. Sadly, her brain swelling became to much, and she suffered several seizures and never recovered from them. In between the seizures she told me she loved me, I whispered in her ear that it was okay to let go, that she had fought to long and endured to much suffering for one person. I told her I loved her and that we would all be fine. At this point she began to breathe more easily, and passed the following morning.

I was going through her things from the hospital, and i found a slip of paper of notes she was jotting down, she told me about this "Invention" she had for gag gift scented candles that actually had awful smells. on the note the was the following:

MY STINKY SMELL INVENTION

1. onions or scallions and Garlic
2. Rotten eggs (already done in a stink bomb but may be a good seller)
3. Fish-clam (ask Boo) that was her nickname for our dog bandit who loves clams
4. smell of gas
5. Garlic (again)
6. Blue bathroom sanitizer on planes
7. Nail polish remover
8. Hamster cage.

She wrote this out two nights before she passed, once again humor was the fiber that ran through her entire odyssey. if any of you care to bring this dynamic invention to market, be sure to name it after her.

We all loved her very much, please keep her as an inspiration to all who are suffering through this awful disease. The main purpose of her blog was to help others in this struggle with information on clinics we went to, treatments that were effective and how to keep a positive attitude while suffering through this ordeal.

After being diagnosed with Sarcoma in 2007, she endured 23 surgeries, 120 radiation treatments,  3 cycles of chemo, an assortment of clinical trials and holistic treatments. we tried it all, but in the end it just wasn't in the cards. Through it all, her friends, family, loved ones and blog followers is what kept her going, and for that I thank you. your comments and support made it easier for us to find the strength to get through this.

She jotted down the following quote in her diary "in three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: It goes on" Robert Frost.

that exemplifies her spirit, and we should remember that as we recover from this terrible blow we suffered. she was a dynamic spirit, who cast a bright light, so we all have a very large void in our lives. But she would not want us to remember her with sadness, but instead only focus the thousands of hysterical and loving moments she brought to each of us.

thank you again for your support, her adoring, and loving husband Paul.