Tuesday, February 17, 2009

Shells, Scans and Friendships




Here are some of the beautiful pictures that I took on my trip to Costa Rica.  I am looking forward to going back to discover the rain forests and beautiful beaches. We had an amazing trip. 

Today February 17th

After finding the perfect parking spot (always happens when I am running late) a mile from the train station......I caught it in time to make my Pet scan appointment. I would just like to know why I am still so nervous about needles and why I haven't gotten use to them.
This is what happened without adding drama (o.k. a little drama!). Needle went in, I squirmed, Radioactive dye (blahha) missed my vein, Arm swelled up, I cried in pain, Nurse said sorry, I turned white, Nurse got a pillow, I cried, Nurse took the needle out and tried the other arm, Nurse said sorry again,  I cried, Radioactive dye (crap) went in, I felt better. Then I drank the raspberry yummy and waited my turn....same as always. I still hate needles. I know that I got the Placebo. I gained 2 pounds and have felt great. I can eat and not feel sick to my stomach.I meant to check my blood pressure today ( Elsa! I forgot to ask!). I have really low pressure, but the Brivanib makes it high. So, I figured if it was low....then I know for a fact that it's the placebo. I am a genius! 
I will get my results on Friday.

I caught a ride on the MSKCC fun bus to 53rd and was able to have a lovely chat with my friend Adina.  She is an amazing, beautiful young women full of life & inspiration. I sat with her while she was doing the  Brivanib clinical study ( her long day) at the hospital.  I felt so comfortable, like I have known her for years. I know we have been through different things (cancer crap) but, it's like we have this bond.  A friendship that has already blossomed. Because, without saying a word we know how hard it's been. The tears, fears & of course the strength that has gotten us through all of it.  
Adina found me from my blog! On the friday before I left for Costa Rica she came up to me in hospital. Adina & her husband Chaim told me that the only reason she was starting it was because of me. She read my blog and after I spoke about the trial she wanted to do it. 
Today Adina gave me a Thank You card. I opened it on the train. While tears poured out  I searched my bag to find a hanky ( yes, I have them and it's usually up my sleeve). In the card she gave me 2 lovely sayings. This one I love...

What lies behind us, 
and what lies before us 
are tiny matters 
compared to what lies 
within us.


Thank you Adina. I love your passion for life &  your beautiful soul.  I loved sitting with  you today and will always be here if you need me. Doctors & shopping trips are a part of my friendship package. 

With Love,
Michelle

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Thanh U Michelle!!! I'm very flattered. I also feel like I have known u forever-and I loved talking to u-I could have talked to you for hours and hours more-I was so comfortable with u. Thank u for sitting with me for the hours that u did-it was so much fun to hang out with u. Looking forward to the next time that I see u!!! Hugs and kisses~Adina.

Unknown said...

Hi Michelle,

please use rawguru.com as a source for your Raw Food Diet info that you quoted from the main page.

thanks!