Wow! My life has been completely nuts! I am going to bed every night with a checklist in my head. When I open my eyes it's floating above me laughing. I just can't get it all done. A little at a time. I am sure I will always have a checklist.
Things have been good. We started renovations on our house last week. It's so exciting and frustrating at the same time. I can't complain because I am finally getting a beautiful bathroom! It's been fun picking out tile and toilets! Packing and unpacking!
I had a scan last week that I put off due to a horrible stomach ache. I couldn't even get out of bed. There was no way I was driving or getting on a train. I also have no interest in hearing bad news. I just want to go a six months with a clean scan. I will even take 8 months! It's been nice not to think about sickness after the stupid pills. I do know that I need to get a plan in order. I see Dr Doom next Friday. Hopefully he will have something for me. I am not getting my hopes up. I know how the conversation will start and end.
Tomorrow I am suppose to be in the city for an MRI. I am not sure if that is going to happen. A little screw up with my appointment.
It's still really hard to think about Elsa. Miss you a ton. I don't understand death.
It's also hard to hear about people around me complain about silly problems. If they only knew what a problem really was. I know everyone has their own daily stuff that they go through. Everyone complains. That is why I have been keeping my conversations light and happy. I just want Paul and I to get a break....I need a lucky streak to start! Please!
Because, honeslty I am happy.